Labor Day Thriller

**Please forgive grammar and spelling errors. I am too tired to proof read.

All last week I was looking forward to this weekend. 3 days of beer drinking, football watching, and bad decisions. However, the teaching Gods had other plans for me. I got a job on Friday night at 7:30pm--seriously they called me at 7:30 and offered me a job. I shouldn't say job, as it is, technically, a substitute position. I start tomorrow. Therefore, I have spent the last 3 days doing arts and crafts and planning. I have not had one drop of alcohol, nor was I able to watch UGA loose its first football game...oh and bad decisions, well the worst decision I made was using the blue construction paper instead of the red.

I was ok with this until about 1pm this afternoon. I got on the train to go to JoAnn's, aka every scrapbooker and craft person's dream, and ran into 2 very excited girls.

They were headed to the Sox v. Sox game. For those of you who are not baseball fans, the Chicago White Sox were playing the Boston Red Sox. Big to-do apparently. I got yelled at once because I spelled it like "socks" instead of "sox," and apparently, that is ludicrous. Like spelling things correctly in baseball is some kind of sin, but I digress. These young ladies both wore jerseys for the Red Sox and one had a poster that said "Mary Me 'insert famous baseball players name here.'" I apologize for not knowing who it was, but I don't watch baseball nor do I care about it.

They were gabbing about how hot some of the players were because obviously if one of those players, who gets paid an absurd amount of money, saw one of those girls in a bar they would totally go for it. Because chicks that take public transportation are totally in these baseball players league.(I hope you are picking up on my sarcasm and anger). Back to my hell that was a train ride to the craft store. Logically the conversation turned to who they were hooking up with--in real life. This could not have pissed me off more, mostly because the guys they were smooching were named Tad and Rod. REALLY?!?!?! I go back to the topic above...baseball players would totally hook up with girls who have past boyfriends named Tad and Rod! I envision these two having a both ears pierced and tattoos of their favorite sporting team and high school football number.

As they recounted their typical Friday night hook up, I smelled it. I couldn't believe I hadn't picked up on it before. I mean, it was so obvious. What I have failed to mention to you is that these two hookers were carrying coffee mugs, and in said coffee mugs was...you guessed it BEER!

It was then that I realized I have lost my touch. Had this been a year ago, heck even a month ago, I would have smelt them from a mile away. Is it because I am no longer a 22 year old, fresh out of college young professional? It couldn't be...I REFUSE to say I am old! I am NOT old, right? Right! I am still a spring chicken. I can still drink beer...out of a coffee mug...on a train...to a baseball game! Well, I may not do that. It could be dangerous, and I might get caught by the cops.

As I exited off the train my anger turned to jealousy. These two girls were going to spend the rest of their labor day sitting at a baseball game, not watching baseball, drinking beer, and living the young 20-something dream. And I, was heading back to my apartment to continue cutting out name tags for my students.

So to make myself feel better, I bought a 12 pack of diet coke and a huge bag of m&m's and headed back home. After 4 diet cokes, the whole bag of m&m's and watching Coyote Ugly, I feel no better. You may say it is because I downed enough sugar to be a feature in Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory, or that I am watching a movie that caused me to buy pleather pants and sing bad LeAnn Rimes songs when I was 15; but I say it is because I feel like an adult. (Pause for a audience "ahhhhhhh").

I guess this is what happens. Beer drinking, football watching, bad decision Labor Days are a thing of the past. From now on, it is about enjoying my Saturday and making sure I get my apartment cleaned. No longer will I have a Sunday spent in bed because my head feels like it has a million little elves taking a pic axe to my brain (jager has that effect). Now Sundays are spent running errands for all the adult things I do. (Can you tell I am new to this, as I am not sure exactly what these adult things entail?)

However, I am not ready to make this leap yet. So I will hold out hope that next weekend will bring some fun like the early twenties days. And if not, well I guess lesson planning and watching VH1 Movies that Rock will have to suffice.

Taubel--OUT!